How To Increase Intimacy Doing Shibari Rope Bondage

Spending time with your partner doing something is a great way to improve a relationship. If you take the time to learn shibari rope bondage, it will enhance your relationship and increase intimacy and connection. Connection increases because of the multiple layers of communication that must occur in both partners. Intimacy deepens because you are explicitly working together to meet each other's wants and needs.

There are three things that I suggest to newcomers right from the start to help deepen the connection. If you use these three simple tips, you will create some magical moments.

 The deepest moments of intimacy occur when you’re not talking. - Patricia Love

As soon as you start to tie/be tied, pause and be still, touch your partner (as negotiated), and let them know you are there to be with them.

Here's why:

So often, when Tops (the one tying) start to tie, they forget that it is a person they are tying. Tops can become hyper-focused on the rope. 

Bottoms (the ones being bound) can start to worry about their safety or focus on helping their Top. 

Both cases can take away from the tie's goal, which is to connect.

So, take just a moment to pause and connect when you start.

When you pause at the beginning of the tie, this is a great time to match your breathing to your partner's.

Here's why you should do that:

Intimacy and connection come from becoming one with your partner. Breathing together may be the most intimate thing you can do with your partner. Focus on that which gives us life, your breath.

Done well, this can create a deep feeling of connection that will carry through the whole tie.

Communication with words can be powerful, but words aren't the only way to talk.

Use your eyes, if you are the Top try to capture you bottom's eyes in your gaze. Hold it for a moment before moving on.

The rope is a tool for communication. How you use that rope to communicate can be intoxicating.

Tops, think about how you hold the rope, where it is moving, how fast or slow. Consider the pressure. Use the rope to pull your partner closer. It is there to communicate your intention.

Bottoms, feel the rope as it moves across your skin. Allow yourself to drink in the sensation. Move with your Top, as they provide direction with the rope.

But don't go overboard. You don't want only to use the rope to communicate. Use your body, especially your hands (as negotiated), and of course, use your words to make sure your partner is enjoying the rope. 

If you have read this far, I am sure you have already imagined how doing these suggestions will improve your connection, deepen intimacy, and make your communication even more vibrant.

Until next time!

- SirKnottyDan